In life I think sometimes we all need a fresh start. The chance to begin again, whether it be a project or a life-changing decision.
I’ve been thinking about this a lot because for myself personally this would be my relationship and attitude when it comes to weight-loss. The posts relating to weight-loss have decreased on this blog, and not because I’ve stopped wanting it but because I’ve stopped trying to achieve it.
This wasn’t a conscious choice, it’s something that happened gradually and it became a vicious circle. I wanted to get back on it but was (and am) too worried about facing up to the fact I’ve undone all my previous work. Logically I am aware that even if I have undone everything previous that shouldn’t stop me from trying again.
Am I disappointed? Yes. However, the more I reflect the more I realise that whilst I am saddened that I’ve let myself get to this point again I’m disappointed more-so that I’m continuing to let it happen because I’m too scared to take ownership. In my head I know Slimming World works however, I’ve felt dread for weeks about going back and have actively tried to avoid it. Then yesterday I received a text from my consultant and it wasn’t an angry or disappointed “Where have you been?!” kind of text, which is for some reason what I pictured if I ever did return, instead it was actually a very sweet (and very funny!) message which made me realise what a complete idiot I was being.
Avoiding something, be it weight-loss or any issue that might be going on in your life, doesn’t make it better and it doesn’t make it go away. This is something we all know but when we’re in that situation ourselves sometimes we just want to stand still and hope that it forgets about us, it won’t and not necessarily because anyone else will remind you or bring it up but because you won’t allow yourself to forget.
I’ve messaged my consultant and asked if it would be possible for me to have a fresh start. I think this would be very beneficial for me because, though I know I’ve tried and failed, it gives me the opportunity to try again without saying “Well, technically I need to get down to this weight which I got down to last time before..” etc. etc. It would be a clean slate, and sometimes that’s all we need.