OK, don’t get the wrong idea from the title. Yes I’m back on Slimming World, although to be fair I never really left.. Let me explain.
I had a couple of weeks “off” due to having all my wisdom teeth extracted, and then I got sick. I’ve basically been living off soups, smoothies and milkshakes and – somehow – been sticking to my syns.
I think it’s because I knew I didn’t have to worry about eating normally, so say a homemade smoothie was 9 syns and some homemade soup was 5.5 syns – that’s 14.5 syns. Or when I worked my way to soft foods again (before I went back to liquids ’cause I found out I had dry socket) I had a peanut butter milkshake (because I just fancied it, that’s why!) which was 10.5 syns but the only other thing I had that day was an Omelette (Eggs, Mushroom, Spring Onion, Garlic and Cheese) which was completely syn free. Do you see what I mean?
So when, in theory, I was going to give myself a break because I thought it would be hard to maintain Slimming while all this was happening, it’s apparently it’s somewhat ingrained.
So, back to the title – why does it say “Again”? Well, in all of this I’m not sure what happened – probably my fault as forgot to keep in contact with my consultant (who sadly left while I was away) but my information wasn’t on the system when I returned… so I had to rejoin as a new member.. Yep!
The good news? I lost 4.5lb in the time I was off.
The bad news? That is now my starting weight.
Oh well, I’m going to view it as a fresh start. I have these spurts with Slimming World. In January I had 4 weeks in a row of losses, I was on it!
I got my teeth taken out 2 weeks ago and the couple of weeks before that were just not good. I hate thinking in terms of ‘good’ and ‘bad’ because food is fuel. The problem is that, depending on the machine, you may f*** up your engine.
Does that analogy work? Let me know.
The other problem is I don’t see food as fuel, I see it as comfort, as a reward, as something to do when I’m bored, as something that makes me happy. Food, if you think about it, is around in times of celebration and family/friends events. It’s around in the times where you need some comfort and feeling down. So at some point we, or I at least, have associated food with these emotions and this is what I turn to, sometimes without even thinking. I’ve slowly been getting better at this but it’s not at the stage where I can say I’m confident I’ll never do it again.
There are obviously things which are better for you, and I can stick to the plan for a while, but if I start down the path of the – I want to say binge eating – it’s very hard to get out of that cycle. I’m glad I’ve had these couple of weeks, it’s been almost like a detox. It’s actually quite refreshing not to have to worry about food, but I know I can’t do that forever and nor would I want to – I think we’ve gathered.
I think I’ve said this before but my dad says these things like ‘Eat to live, don’t eat to live’ (similar to Work to live, don’t live to work’) and it’s probably something I should remember.
I know Slimming World works, I’ve seen it with my own eyes. My sister has done amazingly and my Dad, when he’s focused, he does incredibly well!
I’m one of those people who if I don’t see results (and it doesn’t have to be on the scale, I mean in general) I get bored easily. I want to be more healthy, not just with my weight but with my lifestyle but I’m also one of these people who, I can plan friends events and everything will go off just fine but, when it comes to me I plan but I live in the moment and I’m just very lazy.
I have to stop with the self-sabotage. I have to rid myself of 23 years of bad habits I’ve developed. I also have to stop saying ‘I have to’ because that’s going to get annoying.
I am still using my Slimming World Instagram (nicoleswjourney). I can forget but I’m getting used to it again and it’s really good to see what other people are doing and using it as sort of a food diary.
That got a little deep! I’m going to end this on something for you (I mean if you got this far then that deserves some congratulations!).
From someone who is constantly back and forth – stick with it, because you will regret it so much more if you don’t. If you find it’s not working for you personally, don’t be afraid to try something else, but keep trying. Keep fighting. Most importantly don’t be too hard on yourself. If you choose to go off plan for a meal or a day then it’s your choice and it’s OK. Wake up ready to take on the day with a fresh outlook and no guilt. It’s a lifestyle, not a contest. There is no winner and no loser. It’s just for you, so do it for you.